Rub the wrong way
Last night on the bus I stood in my favorite spot and posted up for the four stops home. Some guy comes in and stands directly in front of me, crowding my space. The bus was relatively empty and I figure he was invading my territory because that was his favorite spot. Nevertheless, standing all up on me in an empty bus is one of my pet peeves. I tried nudging the back of his shoe to annoy him and get him to take a few steps away. That didn’t work.
A few moments later I came upon the ultimate solution. I put my hand in my coat pocket and began brushing his ass back and forth with it. He was on the other side of the bus as quick as lightning. Others have pointed out that this trick might “rub someone the wrong way” and land me in a bit of trouble.
Dec 10th, 2007 at 10:35 pm
Uh, yeah. Maybe you should have just been the bigger person, and moved to another spot. Your “favorite spot” would have been waiting for you on your next ride home anyway. If you are not the pervert, then you probably just made some other pervert’s day.
Dec 11th, 2007 at 10:06 pm
I can’t stand it when people don’t respect my “space cushion.” especially when you’re there first. C’mon it’s not like you abruptly showed up there, y’know? Being a woman I don’t think it would be good to “brush” a guys butt, god knows what that’d initiate! There’s gotta be something universal we riders can do to make people back off…what about a wet cough? Right at their head? It is flu season…
Dec 12th, 2007 at 10:32 am
wow. you are a genius. this is incredible. i wish there were more people like you in the world. i plan on doing this the next time someone gets in my space! thanks for the idea!
Dec 12th, 2007 at 12:27 pm
I clearly need to start riding the bus more. Matt…see you on the #4. I’ll be the gal dominating your sweet spot.
Dec 13th, 2007 at 5:15 pm
I bet Kara is your assistant and you paid her to write that comment. Butt rubber!!
Aug 1st, 2009 at 9:28 pm
Note to self, if someone rubs my butt, make sure to fart before slowly moving over.