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The Tour Guide

Give a man a microphone and a captive audience and you’re asking for trouble. Unfortunately, this is the case for one of the drivers on my afternoon return route. I call him “Tour Guide Driver”.

TGD doesn’t just announce stops. TGD likes to provide a running commentary on the trip home. Here are a few of my “favorite” quotes (in your best tour guide voice).

“Last stop for Kieran’s Irish Pub. Any takers? No? Looks like everyone’s going to Maplewood.”

“Next we’ll be stopping in Maplewood, a lovvvvvely suburb of St. Paul.”

“This is the last stop of the downtown zone. Stay warm out there, it’s pretty cold!” (No kidding.)

He actually frequently makes other comments about shortcuts that didn’t work out (see Stick to the Route) and other comments that I can’t quite make out. He just talks, talks, talks all the way home. Very annoying. He’s gone beyond the threshold of friendly driver.

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