Harry the lady lover
I was riding my bus last week when a particularly chatty and loud man (let’s call him Harry) got on a few stops after me. Harry was talking to the people sitting around him when a woman got on the bus a few stops later. She had a plaid coat with a fur collar, and Harry asked if he could buy it for his wife. Apparently, he had upset his wife recently and this coat would really make it up to her. The woman had no interest in selling her coat and got a bit perturbed at Harry’s continuing attempts to persuade her.
Eventually, Harry gave up and went into a long diatribe about why the love of a good woman is so important. The man next to him rolled his eyes, and Harry told him that he just didn’t understand because he clearly didn’t have a woman. The other man declared loudly, “I’m gay.” This clearly shocked Harry who quieted down for a few minutes. The other man got off at the next stop.
Harry then began loudly expressing his disbelief. Then he declared that he just couldn’t be gay, no matter how he tried, because he just loved women too much. Somehow this tangent led to him saying God Bless America a few times and then trying to make eye contact with some of the women on the bus.
Eventually Harry’s stop came, and low and behold, he had no money. Not that he didn’t spend several minutes searching through every pocket in his coat and backpack. Eventually, the driver told him to just get off the bus. Rather than go quietly, Harry turned around and declared to the passengers of the bus, “I’m drunk.”
I guess you can’t fault him on his honesty. And I’m very glad he wasn’t driving.
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